Shepherding a Child's Heart Session 2 - Getting To The Heart of Behavior

[0:00] Back when there was a Radio Shack on Route 93, a Radio Shack store, and I went in there one day and they had these little matchbox size remote control cars.

[0:21] And I thought, what a great thing to buy for my grandchildren to play with when they come to our house.

[0:39] And so the next Sunday we had a family meal together. All nine grandchildren were there. And I showed them the car.

[0:51] And, you know, what was I thinking? One car and nine kids. And so I noticed one of my grandsons following his sister around the room.

[1:09] And imploring her with all kinds of biblical exhortations. You know, God says we should love others more than we love ourselves.

[1:19] And that we should share with others. And I think it would be very kind for you to give me that toy. That's what God would want you to do.

[1:33] Now, you know, he was not really concerned with her being Christ-like and her behavior. But he really didn't want to be so concerned with Jesus Christ. He wanted the toy. He simply wanted the toy.

[1:45] And every parent has seen children behave in those kinds of ways. And all the parents see children behave in those kinds of ways. And we ask them, why did you do that? And you ask them, why did you do that? And what do children say when you ask that question?

[1:57] I don't know. But the answer to the question is, it's the heart. That's really the answer for everything all of us do.

[2:13] It all flows out of the heart. Proverbs 4.23 Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life.

[2:27] We live out of our hearts. All the hopes and dreams of the person reside within the heart. Now, if we want to think about the heart biblically, we have to provide some correction for our thinking.

[2:41] Because in popular conversation, we refer to the heart as the seat of our emotions. And so, we even have phrases like, have a heart.

[3:01] By that we mean, be tender, be understanding of me. And we think of the mind as the cool, calculating, reasoning part of us.

[3:11] We think of the mind as the part that calcula and razona. But the Bible does not use the word heart in that way. But the Bible does not use the word heart in that way. The Bible uses the word heart to describe the center core of our being.

[3:25] The Bible uses the word heart to describe the center core of our being. It's the thinking, responding person. It's you. The person that responds, it's you. And all the hopes and dreams of our children and ourselves lie within the heart.

[3:40] All the hope of our children and our children, they rest in the heart. And of course, the Bible has much to say about the heart. The Bible has much to say about the heart. There are almost 700 passages that talk to us about the heart in the scripture.

[3:54] There are almost 700 passages in the scripture that talk to us about the heart in the scripture. I spent one summer examining every one of them. And collating them into these lists of activities.

[4:07] And there are many activities. But I want to just give a very simple distillation of that. But I want to just give a very simple distillation of that. If we think of the classical definition of the person, mind, emotions, will.

[4:21] In the Bible, all of those activities are activities of the heart. So, we think with our hearts.

[4:36] God flooded the world because the thoughts of men's hearts were only evil. We remember with our hearts. We know with our hearts.

[4:57] Know in your heart that as a man disciplines his son, the Lord disciplines you. We discern with our hearts. The discerning heart requires knowledge.

[5:11] We store things in our hearts. The word have I hidden in my heart that I might not sin against you. We see with our hearts.

[5:23] Paul prays that the eyes of your heart would be opened. We make connections with our hearts. We meditate with our hearts.

[5:35] May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in your sight. We ponder with our hearts. Mary takes these things she learns of Jesus and she ponders them in her heart.

[5:48] Mary meditaba esas cosas y la guardaba en su corazón. Now, all of those things we would think of as cognitive activities. Esas son actividades cognitivas. But the Bible says they're activities of the heart. Pero la Biblia dice que esas son actividades del corazón.

[6:00] You have this amazing organ in your cranium. Tenemos este órgano en nuestro cráneo. And it has the ability to recall information and to store information.

[6:11] Y tiene capacidad de recordar información y almacenar información. Y la organiza. But whatever we make of the brain, the course of thought is always established by the heart.

[6:24] Ya sea lo que hagamos con nuestro cerebro, el fundamento está en el corazón de lo que hacemos. And of course, it wouldn't surprise you that emotional activities are activities of the heart. Remember when Saul saw the Philistine armies gathering for that final battle, he was afraid.

[6:42] Cuando Saul vio a ese armamento de los Philistos reunido para la batalla, él se asustó. Michael, David's wife, despised David in her heart. Michael despreció a David en su corazón.

[6:55] When she saw him dancing before the Ark of the Covenant. Cuando ella le vio danzando ante el Arca del Pacto. God told Eli, the priest, all of your sons will fill your heart with grief and your eyes with tears.

[7:08] A Elise le dijo que sus hijos iban a romper y quebrantar su corazón y le iban a llenar de lágrimas. We lust with our hearts. Codiciamos con nuestro corazón. The Proverbs, speaking of the wayward woman, say do not lust in your heart after her beauty.

[7:25] Hezekiah's heart was filled with pride. El corazón de Ezekiah estaba lleno de orgullo. God humbled him of the pride of his heart. Y Dios lo humilló, le humilló su corazón. We rejoice with our hearts.

[7:36] Nos regocijamos con nuestro corazón. Hannah in the temple, she says my heart rejoices in God my Savior. Hannah dice, mi corazón se regocija en Dios mi Salvador. And of course activities of the will flow from the heart.

[7:48] Las actividades de la voluntad fluyen del corazón. We seek God with our hearts. Buscamos a Dios con nuestro corazón. My heart says of you, seek your face. We give with our hearts.

[8:01] Damos con nuestros corazones. Everyone should give what he's decided in his heart to give. We repent with our hearts. Nos repentimos con nuestro corazón. Sacrifices of God are a broken and contrite heart.

[8:15] We believe with our hearts. It's with the heart that man believes and is saved. El corazón se cree para ser salvo. And my point is simply to help us see that the Bible uses the heart as descriptive of all the activities that go on within us.

[8:30] Mi punto es para yo enseñarles a ustedes que la Biblia describe que el corazón tiene control de todas las actividades que hacemos. And the importance of the heart is a major theme throughout the word of God. El corazón es un tema importante en todas las escrituras.

[8:43] Remember that passage in 1 Samuel chapter 17. En 1 Samuel capítulo 17, el pasaje. Samuel is sent to anoint a new king for Israel.

[8:55] Samuel iba a ungir a un nuevo rey en Israel. And while he's offering sacrifices with Jesse's sons. Y cuando él está ofreciendo sacrificios con los hijos de Jesse. The sons of Jesse are brought before the prophet.

[9:06] Los hijos de David de Isaías se presentan ahí delante de él. He's waiting for a word from God about whom he should anoint. Él está esperando palabras de Dios para saber a quien él iba a ungir. First young man that comes into his presence.

[9:19] El primer joven que viene a su presencia. He's tall. He's handsome. Él es alto, bohimoso. He looks like a king. Parecia un rey. And Samuel thinks this must be the man.

[9:29] Y Samuel pensó este debe ser el rey. And God speaks to Samuel. Y Dios le habla a Samuel. He says do not pay attention to his height or his appearance for I have rejected him.

[9:41] No preste atención a su altatura ni su hermosura porque yo lo he rechazado a él. Man, the Lord does not look at things man looks at. Dios no mira las cosas que los hombres miran. Man looks at the outward appearance but the Lord looks at the heart.

[9:54] Los hombres miran las apariencias externas. Pero Dios mira el corazón. What is God concerned with? ¿Por qué está Dios preocupado? God is concerned with the heart. Dios está preocupado por el corazón.

[10:05] Deuteronomy chapter 10. Deuteronomy 10. Verse 12. This is one of my favorite Old Testament passages about the heart. Now, O Israel, what does the Lord your God ask of you?

[10:23] It's a great question. What does God want from us? This is a great question. What does God want? What does God want?

[10:44] Whole hearted service to him. Corazones, nuestra vida con nuestro corazón completo hacia él. In 2 Chronicles 16. 2 Chronicles 16. David is giving the kingdom to his son Solomon who is going to follow him as king.

[10:58] El reino va a ser dado a Solomon para que reine. And he gives fatherly advice to him. Y él le da consejos paternos a él. And he says to them, beginning with verse 9.

[11:08] Y él le dice en el versículo 9. Now, you, Solomon, my son, acknowledge the God of your father and serve him with wholehearted devotion and with a willing mind. For the Lord searches every heart and understands every motive behind the thoughts.

[11:22] Reconoce al Dios de tu corazón porque Dios escudriña los corazones y las intenciones de él. Go to the next slide, please. So God is a searcher of hearts even down to the motives for what we think.

[11:35] Dios escudriña los corazones aún los motivos por las cosas que pensamos. And you can look at some of the rest of these passages in your own leisure.

[11:46] Vamos a ver el resto. Pueden ustedes ver por sí mismos el resto de esos pasajes. It should not surprise us that Jesus emphasizes the heart throughout his public ministry. Pero no debemos impresionarnos de que Cristo enfatizó tanto el corazón en su ministerio.

[12:00] Jesus doesn't draw the boundary at behavior. Él no pone los límites al comportamiento. He draws the boundary at the heart. Él habla del corazón, las barreras que le ponen al corazón.

[12:11] Sinful behavior has its origins in the heart. El corazón pecaminoso tiene el origen del corazón. El comportamiento pecaminoso. So you remember, when Jesus talks about murder, He doesn't just talk about killing someone.

[12:27] Cuando Él habla acerca del homicidio, no solamente habla de matar a la persona. Because murder is more than just taking a weapon against someone and taking their life. Asesinar a alguien es mucho más que tomar un arma y quitar la vida a alguien.

[12:40] If you hate your brother in your heart, you're guilty of murder. Dice que si aborreces a tu hermano en tu corazón, has cometido homicidio contra él. And you might remember, He does the same thing when He talks about adultery.

[12:51] Y recuerden que también dice lo mismo con relación al adulterio. He says, adultery takes place in the heart. Dice que el adulterio toma lugar en el corazón.

[13:03] So if a man looks at a woman to lust after her, Cuando un hombre viera a una mujer para codiciarla, He has committed adultery with her already. Ha cometido ya adulterio ya en el corazón.

[13:14] Where? Where, donde? In his heart. In el corazón. Do you see what Jesus is doing? Ven ustedes lo que el Señor Jesús está haciendo aquí. See, He's putting the focus on what's going on inside, not just on the external behavior.

[13:27] Él está enfocando en lo que hay dentro, no solamente en el comportamiento externo. Because what's going on inside is far more profound. It's what produces what goes on in behavior.

[13:40] Because what's happening inside is what produces the external behavior. So defilement is not a matter of, it's not an external problem. It's an internal problem.

[13:53] It's an internal problem. The heart is always at the leading edge of behavior. The heart is always at the leading edge of behavior. And so behavior cannot be understood in isolation from the heart.

[14:05] The heart is always at the leading edge of behavior. And you see those themes throughout the ministry of Christ. Even in the Sermon on the Mount.

[14:17] There are the Beatitudes. He's talking about the heart. Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God. Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God. And later in the Beatitudes, He talks about treasure.

[14:34] And He says, whatever you treasure, owns your heart. Because it's out of the overflow of the heart.

[14:46] Because of all things. Now, so, throughout the ministry of Christ, we find this emphasis on the heart. A través del ministerio de Cristo, vemos el énfasis en el corazón.

[14:57] If you could just click through those slides. I missed that slide. And the next one, yeah, we'll go to that one. Thank you. So, that emphasis and the importance of the heart. Este énfasis en la importancia del corazón.

[15:09] Is throughout Christ's ministry. Está a través del ministerio de Cristo. So, then this little graphic I'm showing that whatever is happening in behavior. Has its origin in the heart.

[15:19] Esto que vemos aquí, lo que el comportamiento tiene su origen en el corazón. It's out of the overflow of the heart that the mouth speaks. De la abundancia del corazón habla la boca. Now, I want to look with you at Matthew or Mark chapter 7.

[15:33] En Marcos 7. And the Mark 7 and the Matthew 15 passage are parallel passages. Y en el capítulo 15 de Mateo son pasajes paralelos.

[15:44] In the interest of time this morning, we'll look at Mark chapter 7. Pero vamos a ver el que está en Mateo en Marcos 7. And I won't give you the whole back story.

[15:55] We won't read the whole chapter. No vamos a leer el capítulo completo. But the back story here is the Pharisees have come to Jesus with accusations against Jesus' disciples.

[16:06] El asunto es que los fariseos habían venido a donde Jesucristo a acusarle por causa de sus discípulos. And the accusation is that the disciples have defiled themselves.

[16:18] Y supuestamente era que los discípulos se habían corrompido. Because they have eaten without ceremonial washing. Porque habían comido sin haberse lavado las manos ceremonialmente. And therefore they're defiled through what they've eaten.

[16:30] Por lo tanto, para ellos, ellos estaban contaminando lo que se estaban comiendo. Y Jesús les amonesta a esos fariseos. And he quotes the prophet Isaiah. Y él cita al profeta Isaías. He says, these people honor me with their lips.

[16:43] Y dice, este pueblo me honra con sus labios. Their lips are saying God honoring words. Ellos dicen con sus labios cosas que honran a Dios. But their hearts are far from me. Pero sus corazones están lejos de mí.

[16:53] They worship me in vain. Me adoran en vano. Their teaching is just rules made up by men. Sus enseñanzas eran simplemente reglas hechas por hombres. Later, after the Pharisees are gone, the disciples come to Jesus.

[17:10] And they say, Master, connect the dots for us. Help us to understand this teaching. And Jesus says these words. I'll begin with verse 18.

[17:22] 7, 18. Don't you see, are you so dull? Don't you see that nothing that enters a man from outside can make him unclean?

[17:34] Because it doesn't go into his heart, but out into his stomach and then out of his body. Está sin entendimiento. No, no, que todo lo, Okay, I'm going to read it again.

[17:46] 18. And then he went on, and he says these words.

[17:57] It's what comes out of a man that makes him unclean. For from within, out of men's hearts. Now, let me change a word for our purposes. We could say from within, out of children's hearts.

[18:12] Because of the heart. Because man is not being used here to describe just the adult male. Because when it says here, man is not being used here to describe just the adult male.

[18:23] It's being used generically to be, this is true of all of humanity. This is true of all of humanity. So we could say it's what comes out of a child's heart that makes him unclean. It's what comes out of a child's heart that makes him unclean.

[18:36] From within, out of children's hearts, come evil thoughts, sexual immorality, theft, murder, adultery, greed, malice, deceit, lewdness, envy, slander, arrogance, and folly.

[18:48] All these evils come from inside, Jesus says. Because from within the heart of the child, they come from the bad thoughts, the adulterers, the fornication, the homicides, the hurt, the avaricias, the bad things, the evil, the lascivia, the envy, the maledicence, the soberbia, and the insensatez.

[19:04] Now, if you think about that list of activities, these are things you see in your kids. Many of them are.

[19:17] Have you ever seen envy at your house? Did you ever hear these words? It's not fair. It's not fair as an envy statement.

[19:27] When your kids say, this is not just, it's a problem of envy. Someone else has an advantage I don't have. It's not fair. Someone else has an advantage I don't have. It's not fair. One of our kids went away overnight to be with a friend.

[19:39] One of our kids went away overnight to be with a friend. The next day, he got home. Al próximo día que regresó a la casa. And within five minutes, he said, I get to have ice cream today.

[19:49] I get to have ice cream, yes. So why do you think you get to have ice cream? You had ice cream last night when I was gone.

[20:05] Now, he came home. He checked the box of ice cream to see if any ice cream was missing. And he asserted his right to ice cream.

[20:15] And he said he had a right to ice cream. We see that kind of envy in children, don't we? Or greediness. When I was pastoring the church, and sometimes I'd be greeting people in the foyer of the church.

[20:33] And my grandsons would come around. They were little boys, and they wanted to go to my office with me. Now, they didn't want to go because they wanted to pray with me over my wonderful sermon.

[20:45] They knew I had this big jar of M&M's in my office. And they wanted some M&M's.

[21:01] So we see that kind of greediness in children, don't we? Or slander. Or that they're defaming, calumniando. My children used to come saying, Daddy, brother's not being nice to me.

[21:13] Mis hijos me venían a decir, mi hermano no fue nice conmigo. I used to ask them, help me understand, why are you telling me this? Yo quiero que tú me expliques, ¿por qué me estás tú diciendo eso a mí?

[21:23] Would you like for us to pray for your brother? ¿Tú quieres que oremos por tu hermano? I'm sure he would appreciate our prayers. Él pudiera apreciar nuestras oraciones. You're not trying to get him in trouble, are you? You wouldn't do that.

[21:38] Or we see lewdness in children. Now, not every child is lewd. Can you get another word for lewdness?

[21:48] I have it here. It's when kids make sexual overtones out of simple things that are said. Cuando ellos hablan cosas inapropiadas, inmundas, inapropiadas, vamos a decir.

[22:00] And you can say something very innocent, and this child will make it into something that is off color. Pudiéramos decir algo inocente y el niño lo va a trastornar en algo como que tiene cierto colorido. Or we see deceit in our kids.

[22:12] Porque vemos engaño a nuestros hijos. I ask my child, did you remember to brush your teeth? Yo le digo a mis hijos, ¿se recordaron de cepillarse los dientes? He says, yes, I remember.

[22:23] Sí, yo me acuerdo. Now, I look at his toothbrush. Y yo veo a su cepillo de dientes. This brush has not been wet for three days. Y ese cepillo no se ha mojado por tres días. I thought you said you brushed your teeth.

[22:34] Yo pienso, ¿tú no me dijiste que te estabas cepillando los dientes? You didn't ask me if I brushed them. ¿Tú no me preguntaste si me había cepillado los dientes? You asked me if I remembered. Tú me preguntaste que si yo me recordaba de cepillarme.

[22:44] I remembered, but I didn't brush them. Yo me recordé, pero yo no me los cepillé. Now, he understood the intent of the question. Ellos entendían cuál era la pregunta en realidad. He knew you weren't asking, was toothbrushing ever a passing thought today?

[22:55] Ellos no era para que se recordaran que ese dientes estaba ahí. So he answered in a way which was technically true, even though it was intended to deceive. Ellos estaban respondiendo en una forma que parecía verdad, pero ellos querían engañar.

[23:07] Have you ever seen that in your children? ¿Han ustedes visto eso alguna vez en sus hijos? Or even closer to the point. Have you ever seen that yourself? ¿Lo has visto tú haciéndolo de ti mismo eso? Algo así. And where do these things come from?

[23:22] ¿De dónde vienen todas esas cosas? Jesus makes it clear in this passage. Jesucristo lo hace claro en el pasaje. All these things come from within. They come from the heart.

[23:33] Now in Luke 6 we have this wonderful analogy of a tree. En Luke 6 tenemos la analogía de un árbol. It's one of those very elegant illustrations of Jesus.

[23:44] Es una de esas ilustraciones elegantes del Señor Jesucristo. Beginning with verse 43. Versículo 43, ¿cuál chapter? No good tree bears bad fruit, nor does a bad tree bear good fruit.

[23:57] No puede un árbol bueno dar malo fruto, ni un árbol malo dar buenos frutos. Each tree is recognized by its own fruit. Cada árbol se reconoce por su fruto. People don't pick figs from thorn bushes or grapes from briars.

[24:09] No se cocinan uvas de los espinos, ni de los abrojos. Then Jesus makes this application. El Señor Jesucristo hace esta aplicación. A good man brings good things out of good stored up in his heart, and the evil man brings evil things out of evil stored up in his heart.

[24:24] El buen hombre saca cosas buenas de su corazón, el hombre malo saca cosas malas de su corazón. For the overflow of his heart, his mouth speaks. Imagine this illustration with me.

[24:38] I have an apple tree in my yard. It blossoms beautifully every year. But because I'm not very good at raising apples, when it's time to harvest the apples, the apples cannot be eaten.

[24:52] Pero como yo no soy muy bueno con esa horticultura, entonces esas frutas cuando salen no son muy buenas. They're soft and they're brown inside.

[25:03] Están blanditas y marrón adentro. They're only good for the compost pile. Solamente son buenas para el reciclaje. And my wife comes to me year after year. She says, Ted, can't you do something to fix that tree?

[25:18] So I try everything I can think of. I loosen the soil around the tree. I fertilize the ground.

[25:30] I spray the branches. I prune the branches. But we still have these rotten apples. So one day I'm home on a Saturday.

[25:44] I say, honey, I'm going to fix the apple tree today. So I climb into the tree and I take all the rotten apples off the tree.

[26:00] Put them in the compost pile. I go to the Heller's Orchard below our home. And I buy three boxes of his finest apples.

[26:14] Take them off my tree. I shine them all with a rag so they're nice and shiny. I get some string and I hang these apples in the tree. So I decorate the tree with apples.

[26:29] When it's all done, it looks beautiful. And I say to Margie, honey, I have a surprise for you. So I lead her to the window that overlooks the tree.

[26:42] Here's this tree covered with beautiful shiny apples. The branches are boiling under the weight of the apples. And she's adjusting her glasses.

[26:55] And she's adjusting her to see if she's eating. She knows there's something wrong with this picture. And so she goes out and examines the tree. And she comes out to see the tree.

[27:06] And she finds all these apples are hanging by string. And she's realizing that those bananas are hanging with a little bit. Now, how would my wife respond to me? How would my wife respond to me?

[27:16] She would say, you're a crazy man. You're a crazy man. I didn't want you to hang apples on the tree. I wanted a tree that bears apples.

[27:27] I want a tree that bears apples. But think about our children. Think about how many temptations there are to hang apples on the tree.

[27:37] And how clever we get it, hanging apples on the tree. We might shame our children.

[27:52] You are such an embarrassment to this family. Sometimes I'm even embarrassed to say you're my child. Or we might bribe them.

[28:10] We might promise rewards and prizes. Or we might heap guilt on them. Makes me so sad when I see the way you kids fight over your toys.

[28:29] I have no joy in my life. What can I possibly be happy about when my children are home fighting over the toys all day? Or we might even bring Jesus into it.

[28:45] You know, Jesus can see right through the roof into the family room. What do you think Jesus thinks of the way you fight over your toys? It's not a bad question if you ask it for the right reason.

[29:00] No it's a bad question if we do it for the right reason. But you know you can ask that question without having any real evangelical objective. You're just bringing out the heavy artillery.

[29:14] Simplemente estamos trayendo la artillería pesada. No, they haven't been listening to me all day. Or they haven't been listening to me all day. Let's lob Jesus at them this afternoon. Maybe that'll fix them.

[29:28] Or we might threaten them. Or we might threaten them. You know, those nights you put the kids to bed several times.

[29:41] You hear them in the room. They're running, jumping, diving into each other's beds. You go in and quiet them down. I don't want to hear another sound.

[29:54] I want you to go to sleep. Quit playing. You go to have some conversation with your spouse and talk over the day. You hear the kids again.

[30:06] You go into the room. What are you doing in your brother's bed? I told you not to get up. I didn't get up.

[30:19] How did you get in your brother's bed? I went over the windowsill, over the dresser. I never touched the floor. So you quiet them down again.

[30:32] And you hear them another time. And you're back in the room. Issuing threats. You don't even want to know what will happen if I come to this room one more time.

[30:51] But it will be messy. And it might even be on the news. It might even be on the news. Now all those are ways of manipulating the behavior.

[31:10] And I want you to think about this with me. Remember my apple tree? I've hung these apples in the tree. What's going to happen to those apples over time?

[31:24] What's going to happen to those apples over time? They're going to rot, aren't they? Why are they going to rot? They're not attached to the life-giving juices of the tree.

[31:38] Because they're not connected to the savy that comes out of the tree. They can't possibly endure. It's like that with our children. We can manipulate the behavior for the moment.

[31:50] We can manipulate our behavior for a moment. But it will not produce lasting fruit. But it will not produce lasting fruit. And soon enough, the behavior will revert to the most natural expression of the abundance of the heart.

[32:03] Of what we think, it will return to the fruit that is in the heart. If you think about behaviorism with me for a minute. If we think about behaviorism, it's a word.

[32:18] In behaviorism, the real need of the child is not being addressed. That word, conductism. I'm sorry, can you repeat it again? Yeah, the child's real need is not addressed.

[32:30] La necesidad verdadera del niño no se ha tratado. Because the need is not just a behavioral need. Because the behavior is simply exhibiting ways the child's heart has strayed from God.

[32:52] Lo que está mostrando ese comportamiento, que el corazón del niño está alejado de Dios. Another problem with behaviorism is it offers a false basis for ethics. Este conductismo nos da una clara visión de lo que es la ética.

[33:09] Because in behaviorism, what answers the question, what should I do? Porque en el conductismo, la pregunta es, por qué hago lo que hago? It's what will get me what I want and avoid what I don't want.

[33:20] Es para evitar lo que yo no quiero y hacer lo que yo quiero. In a biblical vision, what answers that question? En una visión bíblica, ¿qué responde a esta pregunta? It's the being in existence and revelation of God.

[33:34] Es la revelación de Dios mismo que tiene que obrar ahí. Another problem with behaviorism is the heart is being trained in wrong ways. Otra forma del conductismo es que el corazón ha sido entrenado de manera errada.

[33:46] I can manipulate my kids with shame and teach them to be people who are shame-based people. Yo pudiera engañar a mi hijo avergonzándole.

[33:59] I can manipulate with guilt. Lo puedo manipular haciéndole sentir culpable. I teach them to be people who respond out of guilt. Y hay personas que obran a través de sentirse culpables.

[34:11] I can manipulate with the fear of man. Pudiera manipularles creándole temor a los hombres. What will people think of me if ¿Qué van a pensar las personas de mí si? And I teach them to be people who live out of the fear of man.

[34:26] Personas que viven basado en el temor de los hombres. Whatever you use to motivate behavior trains the heart. Cualquier cosa que ustedes usan para motivar el comportamiento, entrena el corazón.

[34:37] And of course another problem is the gospel will never be central when I'm manipulating behavior. Otro problema es que si es así el corazón, el evangelio no va a ser el centro para el comportamiento.

[34:49] And when I'm there red-faced saying to my child, You don't even want to know what will happen. Y cuando usted le dicen, Tú no te imaginas lo que va a suceder si tú sigues así como vas.

[35:00] But it'll be messy. Pero va a ser un problema serio. And besides that, God loves in his son to die so that you can know new life. Y acuérdate que el Señor Dios mandó a su hijo para que tú puedas tener una vida nueva.

[35:12] Those things don't fit together, do they? Esas cosas como que no van juntas. You can't tag the gospel on the end of a threat. Ustedes no pueden tirar el evangelio ahí como una amenaza.

[35:23] Those are two radically different systems of motivation. Esos son dos motivos completamente diferentes de motivación. Ellos no hacen un matrimonio juntos.

[35:35] And of course, behaviorism also shows the idols of our hearts. El comportamiento muestra los ídolos que hay en nuestro corazón. Why do I want my children to obey?

[35:48] ¿Por qué quiero yo que mis hijos me obedezcan? Is it just because I want God to be glorified in our family? ¿Es porque yo quiero que Dios sea glorificado en mi familia? Or do I want control? Or do I want ease?

[36:02] Or do I want convenience? Or do I have the fear of man? What will people think of me if my children are ill-behaved? So often our willingness to use behaviorism actually shows the idols of our hearts.

[36:19] A veces el deseo de que nuestros hijos obedezcan es para mostrar los ídolos que hay en nuestro propio corazón también. Now we're in this wonderful position as Christians. We have the Bible. Una de las cosas que nosotros tenemos es que tenemos la Biblia.

[36:31] And the Bible is robust. Y la Biblia es robusta. And it offers us all the categories of thought we need to understand human beings. And it shows all the categories of thought that we need as human beings.

[36:45] And if we think about the heart, the Bible reveals the heart. When we think about the heart, the Bible reveals the heart. You know the passage in Hebrews 4.12.

[36:58] The word of God is like a double-edged sword. And it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart. Or James says, what causes fights and quarrels among you?

[37:11] Don't they come for your desires that wage war within you? Or in Santiago, where they say, where do you come from? Where do you come from? Where do you come from? Where do you come from? Where do you come from? Where do you come from? The heart is where the action is.

[37:22] We live out of our hearts. All behaviors are driven. All behaviors are driven. And of course, we want our children to understand their hearts.

[37:35] We want them to pray with the psalmist in Psalm 139. Lord, search my heart. Queremos que nuestros hijos oren como el psalmista. Señor, escudrilla mi corazón. Try my thoughts. See if there's a wicked way in me.

[37:49] Lead me in the way everlasting. I'm sorry, I mixed up the slides. We can go back to the previous set. So we want to help our children understand their hearts.

[38:01] Quiero que nuestros hijos entiendan el corazón. Now I have a chart here. We'll get back to this more next week. Tengo un esquema aquí, pero la próxima semana vamos a volver ahí. Pero quiero que lo tengan delante de ustedes ahora.

[38:12] When I make the statements out of the overflow of the heart the mouth speaks, that's an abstract statement. El hecho de que de la abundancia del corazón habla la boca, esta es una declaración abstracta.

[38:24] It's true, but it lacks particular content. Es verdad, pero carece de cierto contexto. So here are biblical terms for the things that push and pull human behavior.

[38:35] Las cosas bíblicas que mueven el comportamiento. So we have two lists here. Ungodly heart attitudes and godly heart attitudes. Dos listas. Las actitudes impías y las actitudes piadosas.

[38:46] For example, revenge or vengeance. La venganza. Rather than entrusting myself to God. Contrastado con confiar en Dios. Or the fear of man rather than the fear of the Lord.

[39:00] Or pride rather than humility. Or pride rather than humility. Love of self rather than self-preservation. El amarnos a nosotros mismos antes de preservar a otros. Amor a otros.

[39:12] I'm sorry. Rather than love for others. Self-preservation rather than laying down my life for others. Preservarnos a nosotros mismos en vez de estar dispuestos a dar nuestra vida por los demás.

[39:23] Fear rather than knowing the perfect love of God that drives out fear. Or covetousness rather than generosity of heart. Or envy rather than desire for the good of others.

[39:37] Or envy rather than desire for the good of others. Or hatred rather than love. Or odio rather than love. Or anger rather than peacemaking.

[39:49] Or ira en vez de ser pacificadores. Or bitterness rather than forgiveness. Or amargura en vez de perdón. Or desire for approval rather than a desire for God's approval. O deseo de ser aprobado y no la aprobación de Dios.

[40:01] Paul talks in Philippians 4 about fear and anxiety rather than peace and contentment. En Filipians 4, Pablo nos habla de la ansiedad y el temor. Or rebellion rather than submission.

[40:13] Rebellion rather than submission. And it's those things that push and pull behavior. Y estas son las cosas que empujan el comportamiento. If we help our children see their hearts.

[40:28] Si hacemos que nuestros hijos puedan ver el corazón. We open the way for them seeing how profoundly they need the grace of God. Abrimos el camino para que ellos vean cuán profunda es la gracia de Dios.

[40:41] Because our needs are more profound than just the fact that we do and say things we should not do and say. Porque nuestras necesidades son mucho más profundo que las cosas que decimos o hacemos. It's not just those externalized ways that we sin.

[40:53] No solamente las formas externas en las cuales pecamos. It's the sin that is under the sin. Él es el pecado que está debajo del pecado. And Ezekiel 36 is such a marvelous passage for us.

[41:05] Ezekiel 36 is a marvelous passage for us. Because it says, I will cleanse you from all of your impurities and all of your idols.

[41:15] Te voy a limpiar de todas tus impurezas y tus ídolos. We need cleansing. Necesitamos limpieza. We need to have the idols of our hearts removed. Que los ídolos de nuestro corazón sean removidos.

[41:26] We need heart transplant surgery. Necesitamos una cirugía de trasplante de corazón. We need for God to replace our stony hearts with a heart of flesh. Necesitamos que Dios cambie nuestro corazón de piedra por corazones de carne.

[41:40] We need to be empowered by God to walk in God's ways. Tenemos que tener el poder de Dios para poder obrar en la forma que Dios quiere. All of our profoundest needs are met in a relationship with God through Christ.

[41:51] Nuestras profundas necesidades tienen que ver con nuestra relación con Dios en Cristo. Now at the end of this section, I think you have these in your notes. Creo que tienen esto en sus notas al final de la sesión.

[42:01] There are some questions for you to discuss. Algunas preguntas que están ahí en el folleto que tienen para que ustedes las discuten. I just want to draw your attention to those last two boxes in your notes.

[42:16] Las últimas dos cuadros que están ahí en sus notas. And I would suggest to you that if you're here with your spouse or here with a friend. Si están aquí con sus esposos o esposas o algún amigo.

[42:27] Busquen las oportunidades de discutir sobre esas cosas en la próxima semana. Because that's really, it's letting things marinate that will help it to bear good fruit.

[42:41] Cuando marinamos esas cosas nos van a ayudar a dar frutos. Okay, we're ready. Oh, no questions today. Okay, so then I will dismiss us. No preguntas hoy. Así que los voy a despedir.

[42:51] We'll have questions next week. I'm quite sure. Tendremos entonces preguntas la próxima semana. Let's pray. Vamos a orar. Father, we thank you for your truth.

[43:04] Vamos gracias por tu verdad, Padre. And we pray that you would deepen our insight into it. Que tú profundices nuestra visión para estas cosas. And help us, Lord, to make application first to our own hearts.

[43:17] Y que podamos hacer aplicaciones primariamente para nuestros propios corazones. Before we even think about the implications for family life. Antes de pensar en las implicaciones que tendrán estas cosas para nuestra vida familiar. We pray that you give us insight to the connection between the things we do that are wrong in our hearts.

[43:33] Que nos ayude a entender las cosas que hacemos erradas en nuestro corazón. Y que nos arrepintamos de una manera más profunda que simplemente en cambio de comportamiento.

[43:47] Que nos arrepintamos de la idolatría de servirnos a nosotros mismos antes que a Dios. Ayúdanos con esto, te lo pedimos.

[43:57] En Cristo Cristo. Amén.